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Divorce is a profoundly personal and emotionally taxing experience. It can impact every facet of a person’s life, including their work. While it’s essential to maintain a healthy work-life balance, many employees choose not to disclose their divorce to their employers. As a matter of fact, statistics show that 92% of employees will never share their divorce with their employer.  In this blog, we will explore the reasons behind this phenomenon, shed light on the challenges employees face, and  draw insights from various sources to understand the complexities involved.

• Privacy and Personal Boundaries

One of the most significant reasons employees keep their divorces private at work is the desire for privacy and personal boundaries. Divorce is often a sensitive and emotional journey, and some individuals prefer to compartmentalize their personal lives from their professional ones. As noted by Dana Gionta Ph.D. a clinical psychologist, in her Psychology Today article, maintaining boundaries is crucial to safeguarding one’s emotional well-being during this challenging time.

• Fear of Stigma and Discrimination

A study published in the American Journal of Sociology found that divorced individuals often face stigma and negative stereotypes in the workplace. Employees may fear that disclosing their divorce could lead to discrimination or being perceived as less committed to their jobs. In such cases, the decision to keep their personal lives hidden becomes a protective measure to avoid potential biases from coworkers or employers.

• Productivity Concerns

Divorce can significantly impact an employee’s productivity due to emotional distress, court appearances, or childcare arrangements. Some employees may worry that discussing their divorce will lead to assumptions about their reduced ability to perform their job. This concern, rooted in maintaining professional competence, can lead to silence about their personal situation.

• Unintended Consequences

The Harvard Business Review highlights that employees may avoid discussing divorce because they fear it could affect their career progression negatively. In other words, they are afraid of being fired! Employers might subconsciously perceive them as less reliable, despite their continued dedication to their work. This unintended consequence can lead employees to keep their divorce under wraps.

• Lack of Supportive Workplace Policies

Workplaces often lack supportive policies for employees going through personal crises such as divorce. A report by the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) reveals that less than 18% of organizations offer specific support programs for employees experiencing divorce. These include discounted legal services and mental health counseling, but they fail to support your employees through the actual divorce process.  This lack of structured support can discourage employees from opening up about their personal struggles.

• Fear of Pity or Intrusion

Discussing a divorce can sometimes lead to unwanted pity or intrusive questions from colleagues or supervisors. Employees may avoid sharing their situation to maintain their dignity and prevent well-intentioned but unwelcome involvement in their personal lives.

Divorce is a complex and emotionally charged experience that can profoundly affect an individual’s life, including their professional life. While there are many valid reasons why employees choose not to disclose their divorce to their employers, it’s essential for workplaces to create a supportive and understanding environment.

Statistics show that employees going through a divorce will QUIT in the first year of their divorce. Employers can take proactive steps by implementing policies that address personal crises, offering employee assistance programs that include divorce coaching and case management, and fostering a culture of empathy and respect. By doing so, they can ensure that employees feel comfortable discussing their personal challenges when they choose to, without fear of negative consequences.

Ultimately, the decision to share or withhold information about divorce should be in the hands of the employee, allowing them the autonomy to navigate their personal and professional lives as they see fit. As we move towards more inclusive and compassionate workplaces, it’s crucial to remember that behind every employee is a complex, multifaceted individual with personal struggles and triumphs that deserve understanding and support.

At Divorce Right, we help your employee create a plan that is right for their family, and provide support to make the best decisions for their circumstances.  If we can be of service to you and your team, please reach out to us and schedule a time to talk.  We have effective and affordable solutions for your team.